


Vigil

by aye_of_newt



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: 1x09, Angst, Deleted Scene, Gen, Klaus confronts the possibility of losing another sibling, Klaus talks about the afterlife in a way that could be construed as wanting to go back there, POV Third Person Limited, Third Person POV, but from the headspace of klaus, but it's not too intensely suicidal, if that makes sense, it is a vague implication at best, normal sibling love only, so like, we do not permit incest in this house
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:21:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26999605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aye_of_newt/pseuds/aye_of_newt
Summary: After Allison's throat is cut, Klaus watches over her bedside and tries to repair a past mistake.
Relationships: Allison Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves
Comments: 20
Kudos: 65





	Vigil

**Author's Note:**

> Hello
> 
> This concept came to me and I found it emotionally devastating to contemplate so, of course, I decided to share. I hope it's okay as I wrote it more or less in a single creative flow. 
> 
> (aka I did NOT spend a lot of time editing lmao)

After the transfusion was complete, his brothers left to rage or drink or investigate⏤ or whatever their coping mechanism was, Klaus wasn’t sure. Klaus stayed with Allison, watching over her silently and tracking each breath that passed through her lungs. Eventually, his breathing synched to hers, Klaus not allowing himself to inhale until she did. 

Wherever the others had gone, it was far enough away that Klaus couldn’t hear them. The ominous silence was punctuated only by the soft beeps of the machines that assured Klaus his sister was still alive. Tentatively, he took Allison’s hand in his, brushing his thumb over the soft skin in gentle strokes. 

“Hey, Al,” he croaked, his voice rough and strained. 

Allison didn’t so much as twitch. 

“I wish you would hurry it along and wake up,” Klaus continued, trying to force himself to lighten his voice for the sake of a charade that no one was there to see. “Luther is being _unbearable._ We need you,” his voice cracked, “to get him to lighten up a bit. You know I do my best, but you’re the only one he listens to.” 

Klaus blinked rapidly, trying to clear the blurriness from his vision without letting any of his barely restrained tears fall.

“I miss you too,” Klaus admitted. “I know it’s only been like a day or two since we talked, but the toxic masculine energy in this household is ridiculous. We need to get together again, like we did when we were little. Remember? Do our makeup and talk. And I can raid your closet.” Klaus smiled weakly. “And maybe, we could invite Vanya,” he added, sobering again. “I’m sure⏤” his voice hitched as he glanced at the bandage on Allison’s neck again. “I’m sure she’s okay. We’re going to find her and she’s going to be okay.”

Klaus gave Allison’s hand a firmer squeeze as he spoke. “Yeah. We’ll find her and by the time we get back, you’re going to be awake and then we’re all going to laugh at how silly and emotional we’ve been this week. Leave it to Dad to turn us into a mess again, huh? And once we're all back, we’ll make things okay with Vanya. I know she’s been… upset with us, but we’re going to invite her when we go out, okay?”

He paused, half-hoping that Allison would open her eyes and agree with him, laughing at Klaus’ uncharacteristic seriousness as she assured him she was totally fine and had just been pretending to be unconscious the past few minutes because she needed material to tease Klaus with. Instead, she remained chillingly still on the hospital bed, buried under bandages and tubing. 

“Well, if you’re not going to argue,” Klaus continued bracingly, “then that’s the plan. As soon as you get better, you, me, and Vanya are going out. Lunch, wine, shopping, everything. We’ll let the meatheads fight or whatever they do for fun, and the three of us will go have the spa day we’ve all earned after this week.”

Klaus couldn’t keep the smile on his face as he looked down at Allison’s motionless form. 

“Just as soon as you get better,” Klaus repeated again, barely loud enough to be heard. “You’re going to get better,” he said more forcefully, as if he could make it true if he spoke with enough intention. 

Allison didn’t protest, though she also didn’t do anything to support his claim. 

Klaus sat in silence for a long moment, gripping Allison’s hand so tightly she would have protested if she was awake. Finally, Klaus spoke into the heavy quiet. 

“But,” his words caught in his throat as he spoke them, “If you can’t⏤”

He needed to pause to collect himself. 

“If you can’t get better,” Klaus finally continued, holding Allison’s hand close to his chest. “You need to move on.”

Over the past thirteen years or so, Ben had been a constant companion and comfort to Klaus. He was quite sure that it was only because of Ben that he was even alive, in fact. But Klaus was not blind or deaf or dumb. He knew how much Ben longed to be alive, and how pale his existence as a ghost was in comparison to the wonder of life. In the darkest moments of their life, and afterlife, together, Ben had even implied he regretted his choice to stay.

Although he always apologized for saying so once he calmed down, Klaus was haunted, literally and figuratively, by that thought. The guilt for having called Ben back to his plane gnawed at Klaus. He knew he would have to live with his regret and selfishness for denying a final rest to Ben for the rest of his life, especially after having just seen for himself what lay beyond the veil of death⏤ _peace_. 

So as much as it hurt him, as sick as he felt even thinking about the possibility, Klaus granted Allison the permission he knew he should have given Ben. The permission he was struggling to allow Dave.

“It’s okay,” he told her, even as his voice shook. “If you need to, you can let go. I know it’s really scary, but if you need to go, then you can, Allison. And if you have to go, don’t stick around, okay? Don’t get me wrong, I’d really miss you,” Klaus had to swallow several times before he could continue. “But I promise, you don’t want to be a ghost. Just ask Ben.” He laughed hollowly. It echoed creepily in the quiet room.

Klaus forced himself to continue. “The afterlife is so much nicer than the world, Al. I saw it. I mean, it’s kinda weird, and Dad’s there.” Klaus made a face. “But you’re probably good enough that the Little Girl won’t make you hang out with him. Oh, yeah! You’re to love that, Allison. Turns out, _god’s a girl_.” Klaus imagined how happy that information would make Allison and almost managed to smile. 

He continued rambling, repeating himself, and tripping over his words, trying to convince himself as much as her. “The afterlife, heaven, whatever it is, it’s _so nice_ , Allison. You’re not cold or too hot. And nothing hurts. It’s just kinda quiet and calm. You’d like it there. It’s… a lot better than here. And you deserve that. Okay, Allison? I know you can’t answer me right now, but I still need you to promise.” 

Allison, of course, did nothing. 

Very gently, Klaus manipulated the hand he held in his so he could wrap his pinky around Allison’s own limp finger. 

“There,” he rasped. “It’s a promise. No going back, okay? And no staying. Not unless you’re alive.” 

Silence fell again, Klaus falling back into breathing with Allison, praying as much as he was able to that each exhale would be followed by another inhale. He didn’t notice as a few stray tears managed to escape while he kept vigil. 

  
  
  


Some immeasurable time later, Diego appeared in the doorway. “Klaus?” he called softly, some degree of surprise in his voice. 

Klaus jumped even at the low tone, turning to look at Diego, his hand wrapped loosely in Allison’s. “Yeah?” he asked, his voice rough. 

“We’re having a family meeting in five minutes. We need to figure out what to do next. How we’re going to find the asshole that⏤” Diego’s voice cut off as his gaze fell to Allison. He watched her silently for a beat, as if shocked again by the brutality of what had happened. Finally, Diego shook himself slightly, saying, “We’re going to find the fucker and kill him. You in?”

Klaus gave one last glance at Allison. He ran his thumb across her knuckles and carefully let go of her hand. “Okay.” 

Diego nodded. “We’ll be waiting in the living room.” He left abruptly, chased from the room by the hovering threat of death.

Klaus was used to it. 

He lingered, taking one more moment. What he knew could be his final moment with her. He stood, looking down at Allison. “Remember what we talked about,” he whispered. 

Klaus pressed a gentle kiss on Allison’s forehead. “Love you,” he managed to gasp.

Klaus tore himself away from the bed and out of the room, hoping against all his cynicism for the state of the world that just once, their house was passed over and Allison did not need to take his advice for many years to come. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Let me know what you thought or if I made some dumb spelling/grammar/whatever mistake as I always seem to discover like six such errors as SOON as I post lmao.
> 
> Love,  
> Aye of Newt


End file.
